the recipe to falling in love... (a gay man's cookbook to swooning with delight)

if you are one who dares to search for THE one, then it might be plausible to spice up your love hunt and in the process, avoid any bland outcomes. you start off with a fresh batch of men. the most appetizing produce of the farm, and God's gift to women. select wisely and sensibly. good men are plump... soft to the touch. clean. ripe enough. and generate high levels of endorphins in you when you get a whiff of their scent. generally, these are standards used in picking good men. but you may still have other qualities in mind. say, you're more inclined to getting the tall, dark, and handsome kind. that's okay. there's also the fair skinned head turner, the average height chinito, the suave brunette, sophisticated red head, dreamy blue eyed blonde, or (my favorite) the lean, younger, shaved head, bohemian. whatever your preference is, get them early before they run out of stock. now, let's talk preparation. the best way to prepare them is the friendly set up. common friend introduces guy, and then you and guy click. easy to prepare. but there's also the direct approach. say, you see guy, introduce yourself, you meet guy, you ask guy out, and you click. a bit tricky with the introduction part, but it still falls under the DIY section. after preparing them, decide how you want them... rare, medium, or well done? like saying... one night stand, fling, or relationship material. you can never say how this will turn out. because the thing with every recipe, is that there's always an uncontrolled ingredient... emotions. that however you measure everything else down to the last cubic drop... emotions will, and always be the deciding factor of your end product. a one night stand can easily turn out into a fling if both parties entertain the idea that they like each other. and a fling may abruptly end, either due to outside forces or mutual decisions. a relationship on the other hand, requires the most work. let's say, you have a mutual understanding with the guy. you still have to add a few herbs and flavors to maintain the flame of attraction. it is always best to sprinkle this with a pinch of suspense. a dash of excitement. half a cup of endearment. a spoonfull of sweetness. an ounce of spontaneity. tossed with respect, trust, and care. and seasoned with a generous amount of love to taste. remember to stir vigorously. once ingredients are mixed in equal proportions, set aside for at least a day, and select cooking method for desired results. there's baking, frying, boiling, steaming, or even preserving. and if you're the adventurous type, how about jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire? flambe style...