romantic heroes...

"i guess the perfect guy would be…
he’s someone who could…
he could be anywhere in the world, but he chooses to be with her, because…
life is better with her by his side…
what do you think? did i pass the test?"

mr. and mrs. plate...

"some things are true whether you believe in them or not..."

"i don't believe you... you feel that?!"

"i'm not afraid. when they ask me what i like the best, i'll tell them it was you."

moving pictures and written words...

i'm there again..
that phase when i watch movies...
cry at their sad parts...
quote the characters...

and put 'em here...

hehehe!

just saw "City of Angels" yesterday afternoon... (on cable)
then "The Perfect Man" last night... (DVD)
and "My Sassy Girl" just a while ago... (DVD)

so...
bring on the quotes...

of Gyeong Woo's...

just saw "My Sassy Girl" (movie)...
and loved it... like, capital "L" for LoveDDDD...
if there were more movies like this one,

then i'd probably have more of a reason to not go out of the house anymore...
i'd be stuck at home...
in front of the television...
with a big box of Kleenex by my side...

(and a whole mess of crumpled tissues around me)

i found myself laughing and giggling 'cause of their new found relationship...
but...
that part in the restaurant with her blind date...

just brought me to tears faster than Japan's bullet train...
i was crying and shivering before i even knew it...
for those that have already seen it...
here's that (subtitled) part...


i have a good memory.
i’ll recite them…
first, don’t ask her to be feminine.
and…
second, don’t let her drink over three glasses…

she’ll beat someone.
at a café, drink coffee instead of coke or juice.
if she hits you, act like it hurts…

if it hurts, act like it doesn’t.
on your 100th day together, give her a rose during her class…

she’ll like it a lot.
make sure you learn fencing and squash.
also, be prepared to go to prison sometimes.
if she says she’ll kill you, don’t take it lightly…

you’ll feel better.
if her feet hurts, exchange shoes with her.
and finally, she likes to write…

encourage her.

my own "synopsis"...

i used to cry over guys...
but now...
i only reserve my tears for good movies.

~ jason

Stand Up For Love (music video)

Song of The Week

this is my song of the week...
my media player's been roarin' with three outstanding women as they perform the
2005 World Children's Day Anthem, "Stand Up For Love"...
also a cut from their final collaborative album, "#1's", this song delivers so much sense and meaning that i decided to post the lyrics as well...
i would'a added the video... but, i've yet to find a way to display it here... (*epiphany*)
so, here's Beyonce, Kelly, and Michelle... holdin' hands, hopin' for a brighter future for children the world over...
Destiny's Child with "Stand Up For Love"...



"Stand Up For Love"
(video edit)

[Beyonce]
There are times,
I find it hard to sleep at night
We are living through such troubled times
And every child that reaches out
For someone to hold
For one moment,
They become my own

And how can I pretend that I don’t know
What’s going on?
When every second
And every minute
Another soul is gone

And I believe that in my life
I will see (oh yeah)
And in to hopelessness
Or giving up
Or suffering (yeah)

Then we all stand together this one time
Then no one will get left behind
Stand up
For life
Stand up
For love


[Kelly]
I’m inspired
And hopeful
Each and everyday
That’s how I know
That things are gonna change

So how can I pretend that I don’t know
What’s going on?
When every second
With every minute
Another soul is gone

And I believe that in my life
I will see (I will see, yeah)
And in to hopelessness (hopelessness)
Of giving up (giving up)
Of suffering (suffering, yeah)

If we all stand (stand)
Together this one time (time)
Then no one will get left behind
And stand up for life (life)
Stand up
For love


[Michelle]
And it all starts right here
And it starts right now
One person stands up man!
And the rest will follow
For all the forgotten
For all the Unloved

I’m gonna sing this song (song)

And I believe
That in my life
I will see, yes
And in to hopelessness
Of giving up
Of suffering


[Chorus]
If we all stand together this one time
Then no one will get left behind

Stand up
For life

Stand up
And sing, yeah

Stand up
For love

For love
For love

escape artist apprentice...

have you ever woken up from a dream state where everything was moving at a gradual pace, (and it was all peaceful, and just the way you liked it) only to be overwhelmed by the animated reality of your dark room? it may s0und like a mouthful, but it's very unpleasant... i am a troubled soul nowadays. and my conscience is a steadily growing nag that jumpstarts my monochromatic living here... once again, toxicity has reached critical levels.

i need an escape!

wild and running...

this freedom that you enjoy so much and hold dear... how long will it last? certainly not forever... because, as they say, nothing is meant to last forever. yet... another question imposes itself. when this freedom ends... what becomes of you? do i settle down? will i be tamed? will i be spoken for? attached? committed? will my caretaker be pleased? moreover, do i even have a pre-destined caretaker?

so many questions... none of which seem optimistic in terms.

what does your future hold? yet another inquiry... it is yet to end. your life has just been so full of questions... which are yours? now, here's one... what's wrong with me? maybe nothing is. maybe you're just not the marrying type, just like you once perceived of yourself. maybe you're singled out.

then comes miss Bradshaw...

"Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they're supposed to run wild until they find someone -- just as wild -- to run with."

only thing is...

maybe i don't want someone to run with.

magmamahal muli...

okay... this self-confessed Pinoy Big Brother fan just can't help but post this wonderful collaborative song by the Pinoy Housemates...
(am such a sap for these songs)


MAGMAMAHAL MULI

umaasang magmamahal muli
ang buong akala ko'y s'ya na
kabiguan ang napala,
paghilom ng puso'y hindi madali
ang malamang mahal mo'y
walang pag-ibig sa'yo

ang umasang magmahal muli
s'yang magagawa
huwag hanapin ang pag-ibig
ito'y darating sa'yo

aking naranasan... ohhh
ang pagluha tulad ng sa ulan

ang umasang magmahal muli
s'yang magagawa
huwag hanapin ang pag-ibig
ito'y darating sa'yo

ang umasang magmahal muli
s'yang magagawa
huwag hanapin ang pag-ibig
ito'y darating, ito'y darating...
'to'y darating sa'yo

ohhh... ito'y darating sa'yo

poems go Nth...

if you thought Augiries of Innocence was long...
try this one for size...
The Rime of The Ancient Mariner...

an excerpt from this poem was read by Diana of Themyscira (a.k.a. Wonder Woman) in Justice League Unlimited's 3rd season episode, To Another Shore...

poems of length do dwell in my ponderings these days...
they rock!

the rime of the ancient mariner

IT is an ancient Mariner,
And he stoppeth one of three.
'By thy long beard and glittering eye,
Now wherefore stopp'st thou me?

The Bridegroom's doors are opened wide,
And I am next of kin;
The guests are met, the feast is set:
May'st hear the merry din.'

He holds him with his skinny hand,
'There was a ship,' quoth he.
'Hold off! unhand me, grey-beard loon!'
Eftsoons his hand dropt he.

He holds him with his glittering eye—
The Wedding-Guest stood still,
And listens like a three years' child:
The Mariner hath his will.

The Wedding-Guest sat on a stone:
He cannot choose but hear;
And thus spake on that ancient man,
The bright-eyed Mariner.

'The ship was cheer'd, the harbour clear'd,
Merrily did we drop
Below the kirk, below the hill,
Below the lighthouse top.

The Sun came up upon the left,
Out of the sea came he!
And he shone bright, and on the right
Went down into the sea.

Higher and higher every day,
Till over the mast at noon——'
The Wedding-Guest here beat his breast,
For he heard the loud bassoon.

The bride hath paced into the hall,
Red as a rose is she;
Nodding their heads before her goes
The merry minstrelsy.

The Wedding-Guest he beat his breast,
Yet he cannot choose but hear;
And thus spake on that ancient man,
The bright-eyed Mariner.

'And now the Storm-blast came, and he
Was tyrannous and strong:
He struck with his o'ertaking wings,
And chased us south along.

With sloping masts and dipping prow,
As who pursued with yell and blow
Still treads the shadow of his foe,
And forward bends his head,
The ship drove fast, loud roar'd the blast,
The southward aye we fled.

And now there came both mist and snow,
And it grew wondrous cold:
And ice, mast-high, came floating by,
As green as emerald.

And through the drifts the snowy clifts
Did send a dismal sheen:
Nor shapes of men nor beasts we ken—
The ice was all between.

The ice was here, the ice was there,
The ice was all around:
It crack'd and growl'd, and roar'd and howl'd,
Like noises in a swound!

At length did cross an Albatross,
Thorough the fog it came;
As if it had been a Christian soul,
We hail'd it in God's name.

It ate the food it ne'er had eat,
And round and round it flew.
The ice did split with a thunder-fit;
The helmsman steer'd us through!

And a good south wind sprung up behind;
The Albatross did follow,
And every day, for food or play,
Came to the mariners' hollo!

In mist or cloud, on mast or shroud,
It perch'd for vespers nine;
Whiles all the night, through fog-smoke white,
Glimmer'd the white moonshine.'

'God save thee, ancient Mariner!
From the fiends, that plague thee thus!—
Why look'st thou so?'—'With my crossbow
I shot the Albatross.

PART II
'The Sun now rose upon the right:
Out of the sea came he,
Still hid in mist, and on the left
Went down into the sea.

And the good south wind still blew behind,
But no sweet bird did follow,
Nor any day for food or play
Came to the mariners' hollo!

And I had done an hellish thing,
And it would work 'em woe:
For all averr'd, I had kill'd the bird
That made the breeze to blow.
Ah wretch! said they, the bird to slay,
That made the breeze to blow!

Nor dim nor red, like God's own head,
The glorious Sun uprist:
Then all averr'd, I had kill'd the bird
That brought the fog and mist.
'Twas right, said they, such birds to slay,
That bring the fog and mist.

The fair breeze blew, the white foam flew,
The furrow follow'd free;
We were the first that ever burst
Into that silent sea.

Down dropt the breeze, the sails dropt down,
'Twas sad as sad could be;
And we did speak only to break
The silence of the sea!

All in a hot and copper sky,
The bloody Sun, at noon,
Right up above the mast did stand,
No bigger than the Moon.

Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

Water, water, everywhere,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, everywhere,
Nor any drop to drink.

The very deep did rot: O Christ!
That ever this should be!
Yea, slimy things did crawl with legs
Upon the slimy sea.

About, about, in reel and rout
The death-fires danced at night;
The water, like a witch's oils,
Burnt green, and blue, and white.

And some in dreams assuréd were
Of the Spirit that plagued us so;
Nine fathom deep he had followed us
From the land of mist and snow.

And every tongue, through utter drought,
Was wither'd at the root;
We could not speak, no more than if
We had been choked with soot.

Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of the cross, the Albatross
About my neck was hung.

PART III
'There passed a weary time. Each throat
Was parch'd, and glazed each eye.
A weary time! a weary time!
How glazed each weary eye!
When looking westward, I beheld
A something in the sky.

At first it seem'd a little speck,
And then it seem'd a mist;
It moved and moved, and took at last
A certain shape, I wist.

A speck, a mist, a shape, I wist!
And still it near'd and near'd:
As if it dodged a water-sprite,
It plunged, and tack'd, and veer'd.

With throats unslaked, with black lips baked,
We could nor laugh nor wail;
Through utter drought all dumb we stood!
I bit my arm, I suck'd the blood,
And cried, A sail! a sail!

With throats unslaked, with black lips baked,
Agape they heard me call:
Gramercy! they for joy did grin,
And all at once their breath drew in,
As they were drinking all.

See! see! (I cried) she tacks no more!
Hither to work us weal—
Without a breeze, without a tide,
She steadies with upright keel!

The western wave was all aflame,
The day was wellnigh done!
Almost upon the western wave
Rested the broad, bright Sun;
When that strange shape drove suddenly
Betwixt us and the Sun.

And straight the Sun was fleck'd with bars
(Heaven's Mother send us grace!),
As if through a dungeon-grate he peer'd
With broad and burning face.

Alas! (thought I, and my heart beat loud)
How fast she nears and nears!
Are those her sails that glance in the Sun,
Like restless gossameres?

Are those her ribs through which the Sun
Did peer, as through a grate?
And is that Woman all her crew?
Is that a Death? and are there two?
Is Death that Woman's mate?

Her lips were red, her looks were free,
Her locks were yellow as gold:
Her skin was as white as leprosy,
The Nightmare Life-in-Death was she,
Who thicks man's blood with cold.

The naked hulk alongside came,
And the twain were casting dice;
"The game is done! I've won! I've won!"
Quoth she, and whistles thrice.

The Sun's rim dips; the stars rush out:
At one stride comes the dark;
With far-heard whisper, o'er the sea,
Off shot the spectre-bark.

We listen'd and look'd sideways up!
Fear at my heart, as at a cup,
My life-blood seem'd to sip!
The stars were dim, and thick the night,
The steersman's face by his lamp gleam'd white;
From the sails the dew did drip—
Till clomb above the eastern bar
The hornéd Moon, with one bright star
Within the nether tip.

One after one, by the star-dogg'd Moon,
Too quick for groan or sigh,
Each turn'd his face with a ghastly pang,
And cursed me with his eye.

Four times fifty living men
(And I heard nor sigh nor groan),
With heavy thump, a lifeless lump,
They dropp'd down one by one.

The souls did from their bodies fly—
They fled to bliss or woe!
And every soul, it pass'd me by
Like the whizz of my crossbow!'

PART IV
'I fear thee, ancient Mariner!
I fear thy skinny hand!
And thou art long, and lank, and brown,
As is the ribb'd sea-sand.

I fear thee and thy glittering eye,
And thy skinny hand so brown.'—
'Fear not, fear not, thou Wedding-Guest!
This body dropt not down.

Alone, alone, all, all alone,
Alone on a wide, wide sea!
And never a saint took pity on
My soul in agony.

The many men, so beautiful!
And they all dead did lie:
And a thousand thousand slimy things
Lived on; and so did I.

I look'd upon the rotting sea,
And drew my eyes away;
I look'd upon the rotting deck,
And there the dead men lay.

I look'd to heaven, and tried to pray;
But or ever a prayer had gusht,
A wicked whisper came, and made
My heart as dry as dust.

I closed my lids, and kept them close,
And the balls like pulses beat;
For the sky and the sea, and the sea and the sky,
Lay like a load on my weary eye,
And the dead were at my feet.

The cold sweat melted from their limbs,
Nor rot nor reek did they:
The look with which they look'd on me
Had never pass'd away.

An orphan's curse would drag to hell
A spirit from on high;
But oh! more horrible than that
Is the curse in a dead man's eye!
Seven days, seven nights, I saw that curse,
And yet I could not die.

The moving Moon went up the sky,
And nowhere did abide;
Softly she was going up,
And a star or two beside—

Her beams bemock'd the sultry main,
Like April hoar-frost spread;
But where the ship's huge shadow lay,
The charméd water burnt alway
A still and awful red.

Beyond the shadow of the ship,
I watch'd the water-snakes:
They moved in tracks of shining white,
And when they rear'd, the elfish light
Fell off in hoary flakes.

Within the shadow of the ship
I watch'd their rich attire:
Blue, glossy green, and velvet black,
They coil'd and swam; and every track
Was a flash of golden fire.

O happy living things! no tongue
Their beauty might declare:
A spring of love gush'd from my heart,
And I bless'd them unaware:
Sure my kind saint took pity on me,
And I bless'd them unaware.

The selfsame moment I could pray;
And from my neck so free
The Albatross fell off, and sank
Like lead into the sea.

PART V
'O sleep! it is a gentle thing,
Beloved from pole to pole!
To Mary Queen the praise be given!
She sent the gentle sleep from Heaven,
That slid into my soul.

The silly buckets on the deck,
That had so long remain'd,
I dreamt that they were fill'd with dew;
And when I awoke, it rain'd.

My lips were wet, my throat was cold,
My garments all were dank;
Sure I had drunken in my dreams,
And still my body drank.

I moved, and could not feel my limbs:
I was so light—almost
I thought that I had died in sleep,
And was a blesséd ghost.

And soon I heard a roaring wind:
It did not come anear;
But with its sound it shook the sails,
That were so thin and sere.

The upper air burst into life;
And a hundred fire-flags sheen;
To and fro they were hurried about!
And to and fro, and in and out,
The wan stars danced between.

And the coming wind did roar more loud,
And the sails did sigh like sedge;
And the rain pour'd down from one black cloud;
The Moon was at its edge.

The thick black cloud was cleft, and still
The Moon was at its side;
Like waters shot from some high crag,
The lightning fell with never a jag,
A river steep and wide.

The loud wind never reach'd the ship,
Yet now the ship moved on!
Beneath the lightning and the Moon
The dead men gave a groan.

They groan'd, they stirr'd, they all uprose,
Nor spake, nor moved their eyes;
It had been strange, even in a dream,
To have seen those dead men rise.

The helmsman steer'd, the ship moved on;
Yet never a breeze up-blew;
The mariners all 'gan work the ropes,
Where they were wont to do;
They raised their limbs like lifeless tools—
We were a ghastly crew.

The body of my brother's son
Stood by me, knee to knee:
The body and I pull'd at one rope,
But he said naught to me.'

'I fear thee, ancient Mariner!'
Be calm, thou Wedding-Guest:
'Twas not those souls that fled in pain,
Which to their corses came again,
But a troop of spirits blest:

For when it dawn'd—they dropp'd their arms,
And cluster'd round the mast;
Sweet sounds rose slowly through their mouths,
And from their bodies pass'd.

Around, around, flew each sweet sound,
Then darted to the Sun;
Slowly the sounds came back again,
Now mix'd, now one by one.

Sometimes a-dropping from the sky
I heard the skylark sing;
Sometimes all little birds that are,
How they seem'd to fill the sea and air
With their sweet jargoning!

And now 'twas like all instruments,
Now like a lonely flute;
And now it is an angel's song,
That makes the Heavens be mute.

It ceased; yet still the sails made on
A pleasant noise till noon,
A noise like of a hidden brook
In the leafy month of June,
That to the sleeping woods all night
Singeth a quiet tune.

Till noon we quietly sail'd on,
Yet never a breeze did breathe:
Slowly and smoothly went the ship,
Moved onward from beneath.

Under the keel nine fathom deep,
From the land of mist and snow,
The Spirit slid: and it was he
That made the ship to go.
The sails at noon left off their tune,
And the ship stood still also.

The Sun, right up above the mast,
Had fix'd her to the ocean:
But in a minute she 'gan stir,
With a short uneasy motion—
Backwards and forwards half her length
With a short uneasy motion.

Then like a pawing horse let go,
She made a sudden bound:
It flung the blood into my head,
And I fell down in a swound.

How long in that same fit I lay,
I have not to declare;
But ere my living life return'd,
I heard, and in my soul discern'd
Two voices in the air.

"Is it he?" quoth one, "is this the man?
By Him who died on cross,
With his cruel bow he laid full low
The harmless Albatross.

The Spirit who bideth by himself
In the land of mist and snow,
He loved the bird that loved the man
Who shot him with his bow."

The other was a softer voice,
As soft as honey-dew:
Quoth he, "The man hath penance done,
And penance more will do."

PART VI
First Voice: '"But tell me, tell me! speak again,
Thy soft response renewing—
What makes that ship drive on so fast?
What is the Ocean doing?"

Second Voice: "Still as a slave before his lord,
The Ocean hath no blast;
His great bright eye most silently
Up to the Moon is cast—

If he may know which way to go;
For she guides him smooth or grim.
See, brother, see! how graciously
She looketh down on him."

First Voice: "But why drives on that ship so fast,
Without or wave or wind?"

Second Voice: "The air is cut away before,
And closes from behind.

Fly, brother, fly! more high, more high!
Or we shall be belated:
For slow and slow that ship will go,
When the Mariner's trance is abated.'

I woke, and we were sailing on
As in a gentle weather:
'Twas night, calm night, the Moon was high;
The dead men stood together.

All stood together on the deck,
For a charnel-dungeon fitter:
All fix'd on me their stony eyes,
That in the Moon did glitter.

The pang, the curse, with which they died,
Had never pass'd away:
I could not draw my eyes from theirs,
Nor turn them up to pray.

And now this spell was snapt: once more
I viewed the ocean green,
And look'd far forth, yet little saw
Of what had else been seen—

Like one that on a lonesome road
Doth walk in fear and dread,
And having once turn'd round, walks on,
And turns no more his head;
Because he knows a frightful fiend
Doth close behind him tread.

But soon there breathed a wind on me,
Nor sound nor motion made:
Its path was not upon the sea,
In ripple or in shade.

It raised my hair, it fann'd my cheek
Like a meadow-gale of spring—
It mingled strangely with my fears,
Yet it felt like a welcoming.

Swiftly, swiftly flew the ship,
Yet she sail'd softly too:
Sweetly, sweetly blew the breeze—
On me alone it blew.

O dream of joy! is this indeed
The lighthouse top I see?
Is this the hill? is this the kirk?
Is this mine own countree?

We drifted o'er the harbour-bar,
And I with sobs did pray—
O let me be awake, my God!
Or let me sleep alway.

The harbour-bay was clear as glass,
So smoothly it was strewn!
And on the bay the moonlight lay,
And the shadow of the Moon.

The rock shone bright, the kirk no less
That stands above the rock:
The moonlight steep'd in silentness
The steady weathercock.

And the bay was white with silent light
Till rising from the same,
Full many shapes, that shadows were,
In crimson colours came.

A little distance from the prow
Those crimson shadows were:
I turn'd my eyes upon the deck—
O Christ! what saw I there!

Each corse lay flat, lifeless and flat,
And, by the holy rood!
A man all light, a seraph-man,
On every corse there stood.

This seraph-band, each waved his hand:
It was a heavenly sight!
They stood as signals to the land,
Each one a lovely light;

This seraph-band, each waved his hand,
No voice did they impart—
No voice; but O, the silence sank
Like music on my heart.

But soon I heard the dash of oars,
I heard the Pilot's cheer;
My head was turn'd perforce away,
And I saw a boat appear.

The Pilot and the Pilot's boy,
I heard them coming fast:
Dear Lord in Heaven! it was a joy
The dead men could not blast.

I saw a third—I heard his voice:
It is the Hermit good!
He singeth loud his godly hymns
That he makes in the wood.
He'll shrieve my soul, he'll wash away
The Albatross's blood.

PART VII
'This Hermit good lives in that wood
Which slopes down to the sea.
How loudly his sweet voice he rears!
He loves to talk with marineres
That come from a far countree.

He kneels at morn, and noon, and eve—
He hath a cushion plump:
It is the moss that wholly hides
The rotted old oak-stump.

The skiff-boat near'd: I heard them talk,
"Why, this is strange, I trow!
Where are those lights so many and fair,
That signal made but now?"

"Strange, by my faith!" the Hermit said—
"And they answer'd not our cheer!
The planks looked warp'd! and see those sails,
How thin they are and sere!
I never saw aught like to them,
Unless perchance it were

Brown skeletons of leaves that lag
My forest-brook along;
When the ivy-tod is heavy with snow,
And the owlet whoops to the wolf below,
That eats the she-wolf's young."

"Dear Lord! it hath a fiendish look—
(The Pilot made reply)
I am a-fear'd"—"Push on, push on!"
Said the Hermit cheerily.

The boat came closer to the ship,
But I nor spake nor stirr'd;
The boat came close beneath the ship,
And straight a sound was heard.

Under the water it rumbled on,
Still louder and more dread:
It reach'd the ship, it split the bay;
The ship went down like lead.

Stunn'd by that loud and dreadful sound,
Which sky and ocean smote,
Like one that hath been seven days drown'd
My body lay afloat;
But swift as dreams, myself I found
Within the Pilot's boat.

Upon the whirl, where sank the ship,
The boat spun round and round;
And all was still, save that the hill
Was telling of the sound.

I moved my lips—the Pilot shriek'd
And fell down in a fit;
The holy Hermit raised his eyes,
And pray'd where he did sit.

I took the oars: the Pilot's boy,
Who now doth crazy go,
Laugh'd loud and long, and all the while
His eyes went to and fro.
"Ha! ha!" quoth he, "full plain I see
The Devil knows how to row."

And now, all in my own countree,
I stood on the firm land!
The Hermit stepp'd forth from the boat,
And scarcely he could stand.

"O shrieve me, shrieve me, holy man!"
The Hermit cross'd his brow.
"Say quick," quoth he, "I bid thee say—
What manner of man art thou?"

Forthwith this frame of mine was wrench'd
With a woful agony,
Which forced me to begin my tale;
And then it left me free.

Since then, at an uncertain hour,
That agony returns:
And till my ghastly tale is told,
This heart within me burns.

I pass, like night, from land to land;
I have strange power of speech;
That moment that his face I see,
I know the man that must hear me:
To him my tale I teach.

What loud uproar bursts from that door!
The wedding-guests are there:
But in the garden-bower the bride
And bride-maids singing are:
And hark the little vesper bell,
Which biddeth me to prayer!

O Wedding-Guest! this soul hath been
Alone on a wide, wide sea:
So lonely 'twas, that God Himself
Scarce seeméd there to be.

O sweeter than the marriage-feast,
'Tis sweeter far to me,
To walk together to the kirk
With a goodly company!—

To walk together to the kirk,
And all together pray,
While each to his great Father bends,
Old men, and babes, and loving friends,
And youths and maidens gay!

Farewell, farewell! but this I tell
To thee, thou Wedding-Guest!
He prayeth well, who loveth well
Both man and bird and beast.

He prayeth best, who loveth best
All things both great and small;
For the dear God who loveth us,
He made and loveth all.'

The Mariner, whose eye is bright,
Whose beard with age is hoar,
Is gone: and now the Wedding-Guest
Turn'd from the bridegroom's door.

He went like one that hath been stunn'd,
And is of sense forlorn:
A sadder and a wiser man
He rose the morrow morn.

a Jason original...

"you know you want it...
you know i want it...
so, what'cha gonn' do?
here's the catch mah friend...
i just don't wan'do it wit' you."




somehow... these words just came to me.
dunno what triggered it...
oh well...

the survey that made it...

FACT 1:
- Name: Jason
- Birth date: april 15, 1983
- What are you doing now? answering this shit
(as what it was called when i got it. hehe!)

FACT 2: Your...?
- most overused phrase(s): does, "oh my f*ckin' god" count as a phrase?
- first thoughts after waking up: "where did the rest of the day go?"
- usual bedtime: 3 am
- most missed memories: when She-Ra was still around...

FACT 3: Preferences?
- Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi... but iced tea is-- *(oh shut up!)*
- McDonald's or Burger King: Burger King...
- Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate... but strawbe-- *(can it!)*
- Cappuccino or Latte: Latte. :)

FACT 4: Do you...?
- smoke: used to... yey!
- sing: more than you can tell...
- have a crush: did... so Miss O's English class!
- think you're really in love: since when did questions become tricky oxymorons? :)
- want to get married: no clue... probably... no.
- believe in yourself: 'course i do...
- get motion sickness: nope...
- think you're attractive: either you're totally conceited or undeniably,
categorically, everyone-says-so, my-fans-scream-my-name
attractive to answer yes to this question...
or just plain naive to not know it's loaded... hehehe!
i answer, nope. :)
- think you're a health freak: is there a middle ground for this?
but... i---yyyes. :)
- get along with your parents: yep!
- like thunderstorms: i just have to watch it right? :) yeah...
thunderstorms sing to me.
- play an instrument: used to...

FACT 5: In the past month, have you...?
- drank alcohol: past month? hmmm... nope... i don't think so.
- gone on a date: let's see... no alcohol... so... that must mean...
no date as well... :) not really a drinker by my own accord...
- gone to the mall: yep yep...
- eaten sushi: yep...
- been on stage: stage? are they the fad nowadays? i'd have to go with nope...
- gone skating: so 6th grade... i say, nope...

FACT 6:
- Age you hope to be married: don't even think i wanna get married...
- Number of Children: just 2... *(but you wanna have kids?! so Jacko!)*
- Names: Alpha and Omega, whatever their sexes may be...
- Describe your Dream Wedding: Corcovado mountain...
at the foot of Cristo Redentor...
mid-afternoon...
everything is white...
personal vows...
close friends and family...
a light breeze...
a forgiving sun...
a kiss for love...and a leap of faith.
*(you've obviously thought this through...
and you claim you don't want to get married, eh?)*
- What do you want to be when you grow up? so Little Miss Philippines... hehe!
would like to be a tycoon. :)

FACT 8: In a girl/boy you would want?:
- best hair color: jet black is so hard to find these days... :)
- short or long hair: short... :)

FACT 9: List the number of:
- people you trust with your life: whoa... uhm...
i guess 10 is a pretty fair estimate.
- CD's you own: at this day and age? anyone is close to at least a hundred.
- Piercings: none of those...
- Tattoos: just one. :)

FACT 10: What...?
-song are you listening to now? Shake It Off...
-time is it now? 2:36 AM...
-is your fave subject? Art of Film...

this little boy's heaven...

too many philosophers have already said

too many words to describe

too many versions of heaven...

and, i don't want to be nitpick or anything but...

they're all just "too philosophical" for me...

kind'a like what barbra streisand's character said to her class when it comes to falling in love...

"... because while it does last, it feels fucking great!"

works for me...

now, at the risk of sounding like all the philosophers before me...

i give you...

my own view of heaven.

heaven...

it may be a state of mind... may be a state of being... but, i think heaven can be found in the smallest of things... and, in the stuff lying in your pantry. bingo!

heaven...

is 2:30 in the morning, and taking that bar of Kit Kat White that you bought the day before, and enjoying it all by yourself.

heaven...

is screwing your diet, 'cause you've been starving yourself anyways, and following up with a big blueberry muffin that your mom bought while you bought the Kit Kat White.

heaven...

is just giving in to your cravings and eating that big, neatly wrapped up piece of kalihim placed beside the muffins...

heaven...

still, is making yourself a wheat bread tuna sandwich at 3 am, after eating the Kit Kat White, blueberry muffin, and kalihim...

heaven...

is having ice cold C2 Apple flavor to go with that sandwich...

and heaven...

is rubbing your tummy and feeling stuffed, then looking at the time... it's 3:30 am.

i just have to add...

everything comes in pairs...

good and bad... light and dark... up and down... top and bottom...

and, yes...

heaven and hell...

hell...

is feeling sick about 15 minutes after, trying to get up from the couch, standing up but can barely move, walking inches at a time, going to the bathroom, looking at your belly in front of the mirror, sitting down for number 2, and standing up, only to remember that you just turned your water pump earlier, hence, there's no water!!!

"men often travel the world searching for something...

only to come home, finding it. "

the little things... *wink*

heaven is the possibility that you make of it. ~ jason

some people have all the fuck... i mean, luck. (originally posted for downelink's bulletin... this is the slightly edited version.)

the games people play...

the things people say...

may want to meet you someday...

or your C-U-Next-Tuesday...

kind'a sounds a bit cliché...

but no one gives a *toot* anyway...

you just ride this wave, and to your dismay...


been there, done that... and this is all too gay.

the comedy of sentences

you've been down this road before...
you've left breadcrumbs that even the crows would not touch...
this forsaken path, you've trekked not one too many times...


is it just you or is it your feet?
will this be what you will be remembered for?
or is this the longest 5 minutes of your life?


slumber for me, please...
i beg of thee, strip me bare of all grief...
and if not too much, show me paradise...


mere mortal, you long for justice without cause!
you shalln't be sated!
what you have been given, you yielded!

crossed it... played with it... made it smarter... (the arbitrary blog originally posted in my downelink)

my mind used to be your playground...

you kept it percolating even as i slumber...
bet'cha didn't know that...

you crossed my mind tonight...
for reasons unknown...
i came, and saw you...
in whatever world you may be, i sincerely hope you're happy...

you've come a long way, stranger...
didn't even think you'd cross my mind again...
but then i succumbed to curiosity...
and let my fingers do the talking...
my first query returned nothing...
kind of like what i'm doing right now...
my second query, returned a single hit...
and there you were; hair gel and all...

if i continue writing this, i'd have to write sixteen lines...
these babies multiply by two, y'know...
but that's okay, i'd like to end this better...
better than saying, "hair gel and all", that is...
but it seems awkward to even say anything to you...
you felt like i broke your heart...
i felt like you broke my spirit...
but chances are, we'll never know...
if we really did break each other's stuff...
the truth we discussed was half-fold and vague...
i didn't want to tell you...
and you had no idea anyways...
these last four lines, may hit very close to home...
but at least he'll know, this pro'lly ain't 'bout him...
birds fly south for the winter, because...
feathered creatures don't do well in places where hell freezes over.....

Song of The Week

yep... it's that time of the week again...

another chance for you to catch the mindless ramblings of this corner of gay and gay...

anyhoo...



well... it seems that "Shake It Off" is still playing strong this past week...

although, Regine is quite the content of the rest of the playlist... the live rendition of "Minsan Lang Kitang Iibigin" has made its mark on the playlist... and "Reigning Still" performances are enjoying their stay as well...



there's a nice song that stands out from all the trills of diva-hood though...

"Bohemian Rhapsody" as performed by The Akafellas bring in the rich mix of culture, humor, vocal pyrotechnics, and uncommon appeal that no songstress can create...



let's see how these guys will fare with two divas this week...

'til then!



(extro: this is "feeling VJ" Kyuubi, signing out...)

asylum's keep

my soul is dark...
yet my words even darker...
i once swayed into the blackest of pits...
and now, my feet lead me there ever so knowingly again...
spare me from this pain, only to be tormented eternally...
oh, happy dagger let me know the meaning of serenity...
i have thrown away all reason and sense, nonchalantly...
for the gathering storm i now shall face, only miracles can help me...
i am sorry mother, i am sorry father, your expectations i have not met...
this is for all the sins-past, and all the sins-present, and for all the things you both don't know yet.

the cab ride... from heLL!

how gutsy can a cab driver get? owh... VERY, if you ask me. take it from someone who's had his share of politically (and ethically, if i may add) incorrect cab drivers who either think that they own the road or that they're above the law. i've seen drivers snake their way in between lanes at cruise speed... seen one other who tried to get back at a bus for holding up the traffic, only for the bus driver to get back at him, at which point, i was scared shitless 'coz that was my friggin' cab! then there are lots of them who think that traffic lights are no more than gallery light installations that serve only as aesthetic artifacts and no more... oh yeah, there's a lot of 'em out there. although quite tolerable in the wee hours of the morning, there are those who have the balls to beat the red light in the most unlikely of times... such as mid-day and even rush hour. however, these "road hogs" often just bypass the traffic system a couple of times, or three at the most. in my experience, there is one driver who stands out. i'd have to say he's either in his mid or late forties... may already have grandchildren... and has been a cabbie for a long time. straight out of makati, there was not a single red light that he stopped for. yeah! you heard me! not one! none! zilch! nadda! zipp! although it was about half an hour past ten, traffic in the CBD is still quite alive at that time. people coming out from the mall, employees who did overtime, others arriving in the area for their call center jobs, and so on. this driver really takes the cake. aside from his apparent immunity to traffic lights, he also has a knack for making sharp turns, swerving lanes, taking that left turn from ayala to gil puyat, underminding pedestrians, and (this just tops it off) taking me in without the aide of a taxi meter! guess he caught wind of who i am and purposefully didn't turn the meter on. (the nerve of that man!) so... if that impressive resume ain't enough, he also has the guts to implore the same laws he broke to his defense. owh ho ho ho! it doesn't get any better than that! he had the balls to be so smug about being in the highway to a truck driver, and to think he just ignored traffic lights not 30 seconds ago!!! i rest my case… wherever that cabbie is at this very moment of publishing… may the powers that be have eternal mercy on him…

must haves...

Priority List:

1. on the look out for a Christmas Tree (one of 'em new industrial steel ones... )

2. that nice Silk Shirt (with the matching Silk Belt thingie please... argh! vanity never ends!)

3. Sally Hansen (?) (600 a pop! no friggin' way!)

my life is an ambigram...

what exactly did they mean when they said, "enjoy the diversity of life"? maybe i'm just bitter... maybe i'm just hopeless... or worse, i am both. but i just find a wee bit of an overstatement in that life-diversity crap... because of all people who should have diversity, spice, variation, and color in their lives, i am the one person who doesn't... and given the fact that i virtually have 2 established residences, i think i should have that quite covered, don't you? okay... i don't even know why i'm writing this bullshit down... i mean, i don't think anyone reads my crap anyways... but, what the hell, i'm just gonna yack here, and there ain't nothin' cyberspace can do about it! this is rent-controlled ya know. (as if!) honestly though... it's SSDD all day, any day, any damn day... i don't even know what i'm doin' with my life anymore, man... i just feel so fucked up... nobody knows the entire truth about me. and i mean NOBODY! there's just a shred of fact here and there, but none of them can say they know what's really goin' on... 'coz they don't! like an ambigram. you look at it from one side, you see a particular image... you turn it around, and you see the same image... and when two people look at it from different sides, they both see the same image. the people i know... the people who know me... and the people who think they know me... wherever they are... wherever they look at me... they only see one image of me. the image that they want to see. not the image that i am. all of them seeing half truths. i guess, the only one who practically knows all of me, is ME... and sometimes, even i get confused. at this point, maybe it is sound to say that i do need professional help. maybe rhoger is right... i believe in my own sadness so much, that i won't let him in... or anybody for that matter. that this is the easy way out, and i took it... that i couldn't be strong for both of us... that part, he's right about. things are about to get pretty messy in the coming months... and i either have to brave this storm alone, or just throw in the towel. now, the uneasiness is starting to set in... another sleepless night is about to break. i long for him again... in the confines of these walls... for Darkness to take me... and in his unholy arms will my soul rest. this ambigram is about to spell death... and that will be the only time everyone will see the truth.